Category Archives: 2015

Conspiracy Theories – 9/19/15

Conspiracy theories fascinate me for some reason.

The older I get, the more I seem to come to the conclusion, that things are not what they appear. It is all spin. It is all story telling posing as truth. So it is up to the storyteller to convince you that they have the REAL story.

The government, actually all governments in general, appear to be the best storytellers. They tell the country’s population what happened in any particular incident. And they set it up so elaborately that to listen one would immediately accept it as truth. But what if it wasn’t.

I became interested in conspiracy theories at the time of the JFK assassintion, which of course, is one of the most investigated, reenacted incidents in modern history. I was only 13. I was Catholic. (still recovering) I had been spoon fed the Catholic doctrine for 8 years of elementary school education and learned to believe that what any official told me had to be true. When they told me the President had been shot, I cried. That was a common reaction. When they told me his assassin had been shot, I choked. I found the story they were weaving unbelievably interesting and could not get enough of it. Here is the thing. It was not only unbelievably interesting, my gut was telling me it was unbelievable in truth. For some reason things did not add up though I could not put my finger on the flaws. That is when I found my skeptic.

In later years… much later years… I would end up working for a doctor who happened to be a practicing resident at Parkland Hospital in Dallas where they took JFK after he had been shot. The story he told me about the President’s wounds, and the actions of the government at that time, seemed to confirm my decades old skepticism. But I digress.

What prompts me to write this, is the most recent Republican debate and the claim that Jeb Bush made that his brother kept us safe. I immediately thought, how were we safe on 9/11? Why was it that the focus on chasing down Osama bin Laden, the purported mastermind behind 9/11, changed suddenly to Saddam Hussein and Iraq?  How did that war make us safe?  In my mind, it was like we arrogantly went up to an evil dragon and poked and prodded until it had no choice but to retaliate and we’ve been suffering the consequences ever since.  It seemed to set off this terrorism trend we are seeming to experience now.  How were the citizens of New Orleans, et al, safe after Katrina?

Has anyone reading this ever watched the Zeitgeist films? They advance a myriad of conspiracy theories dealing with everything from religion, to 9/11, to our money supply. All very plausible and again fascinating.

Why do I blog this stuff? I had a convoluted dream last night about 9/11. When I woke up this morning I flipped on CNN to see if any new conspiracies had hatched while I was sleeping. They were airing the real time footage taken at the time of the JFK assassination. Fluke?

Anyways, this is when I realized that life is a story. You can tell it anyway you want. It’s kind of all purpose in that regard. Stories aren’t real. You make them up as you go along. They can be as traditional or as funky as you want them to be. The more believable you make them, the more subscribers or followers you will gain. The funkier you make them, the more likely it is you may find yourself forgotten in some rubber room somewhere.

I’m thinking the only truth is YOUR truth. Everything else is conspiracy.



Be the best…..

Sometimes we lose sight of hard won lessons. I did that yesterday. I don’t regret it. Well first of all regret is useless. It always refers to the past and usually to something you can’t fix so why the regret? Move on before the regret devours you, but then again…

This lesson that I am referring to I call “be the best _______.” Here’s how it works.

It’s very simple really. No matter what you are in the mood to be, be the best at it. I’m not talking about being the best spouse, mate, parent, coworker, employee, la la la (puke). I’m talking about everything.

Like if you feel like crying… cry the very best you know how to — intentionally. Throw your head back like your name is Lucy van Pelt. If you have ever read the Peanuts comic strip, you know that when Lucy cries she throws her head way back as if to see what’s in the sky, her mouth is open full throttle and there is a big “AAAGGGHHH” coming out of it and her eyes have become virtual lawn sprinklers with the tear drops shooting up out of them and flying in all directions. Now THAT is a good, good cry! Maybe the best!

And if you are going to be a bitch, or mean and miserable, or overly sensitive… do it the very best way you know how.

I once started a new job. I was asked to it. (That happened a lot to me throughout my life. It’s always “temporary” and I think the shortest temporary job I ever took by invitation lasted 3 years!) Anyways, there was a woman there with a bad rep for being a big Bitch. It was evidently her nature. Well, she WAS very good at it unintentionally… and CraNKy?? Wow.. and I mean WOW (picture that word in a big vibrating pointy conversation bubble)! I just pretty much left her to her own devices figuring it was short term. (haha)

One day I walked into the lunch room while she was in mid-Rant. She fixed me with a stare that I swear could have dropped a charging bull I suppose expecting me to be calming, or agreeable, or I don’t know what. I just looked right back at her and said with surprise “WoW Toni – (name changed to protect the innocent) – you are such a good bitch! I’ve always said, if you are gonna’ be a bitch, be the best bitch you know how to be!” and I smiled approvingly at her. She laughed. She quit bitching for a second just to laugh. (my remarks had added intention to her actions)  After that, it became a standing joke. Whenever she became irritated about something (every 5 minutes or so) she would come down to my desk and say I’m going to go be a bitch now, you want to watch? Usually I declined with what I hoped was a gracious thumbs up, but there were times when I snuck around so I could watch her in action. Let’s face it, some people just need a good bitching out and who better to do it than someone at their best!

Anyways, what I’m trying to get across here is intentionality.  When you act with intention you are being at your best.  Intention is another matter all together.  Maybe I’ll blog about it another day.  Just know that when you act with intention, it changes everything.  A major shift takes place all over the globe and beyond.  It’s the butterfly effect.

So please take my word of encouragement today to go forth and be the very best at whatever you are going to be. Have fun. Love yourself. Win a gold medal. That’s what life’s all about.


It seems to me obsession is a subtle and life changing thing.

If you become obsessed, for example, by your occupation, chances are you will excel at it because that is all you think about and if you excel at it, you will find success.  Actually, you will find success at anything you obsess about because you are giving constant attention to it.

To be obsessed with the finer things in life will bring them to you no doubt.  They may come because you found a way to earn them.  They may come as unexpected gifts.  They may come because you steal, or lie or cheat to get them, but I am convinced they will come.

In some ways, mental health also comes with obsession.  For instance, if you are so focused on a negative experience that it becomes an obsession,  that experience could drive you to tears and depression or in extreme cases even some form of anger or revenge.  In the reverse, if you are so focused on your own rightness to the exclusion of any other opinion, you may provoke revenge or be the cause of those tears and wonder why.

It seems wise to me, to take time periodically (the more often the better) to take a personal inventory of  your obsessions.  It seems to me that something, or someone, will always suffer or get kicked to the curb and passed right by to favor an obsession and it might be something important in the end and it seems to me that “the end” is what is most important since we are all – every one of us – headed there.

I once had an experience some might describe as near death.  It was after a surgery and there was an issue getting me “back” into the physical.  To be away was bliss, but while away, there was a swirl of many important points made – none more important than the message I heard that explained the only thing you can take with you in the end, is the love you have GIVEN.  So all the “things” your money or time or energy may have been donated to while walking this mortal coil will not even count in the end UNLESS it was love that motivated you in the first place.

Some say that the most important thing to do is  live a “balanced” life.  Work, family, recreation should all be given equal attention.  To me, that is not accurate.  It seems to me that LOVE ought to be the main obsession of everyone.   It seems to me that all else will disappear if that is life’s main obsession.  That is because in all instances, all else disappears when there is only one focus, one obsession.

To be obsessed with anything requires forgiveness of everything else.  To me, forgiveness just means to let go of.

So to me, forgiveness is the key to heaven.  Heaven is pure love.  What else can it be?